Dream

I dreamt that Myra returned to me and told me that she wanted to be with me.  It was a nightmare, I believe.  

This was after a much more intense dream where Anya and I were visiting my mother and step-father.  They lived, in Ohio, as if the edge of their property faced a giant body of water.  I have been having more dreams recently involving a circular map of the world.  But the body of water was raising and it threatened to flood over onto their land.  Meanwhile, Anya and I had unwittingly managed to kill two men.  I cannot remember what for.  But we were trying to hide their bodies.  Somehow, my stepfather was a co-conspirer.  And it was snowing.

Of course, I haven't seen Myra in months.  Perhaps since the summer.  And I broke off our infrequent email conversations around then.   But sometimes I find myself looking at her Facebook page.  And I have recently thought about contacting her.  Instead I contacted, pseudononymously, my cousin, who is also named Myra.  Substitution, Substitution.

But Myra is no Myra.  Myra first kissed me when we were children in a tent on the back of our grandparents' property.  That became an affair that lasted until we were in high school.  We were "kissing cousins."  But we did more than kiss.  My hands groped all parts of Myra's body.  And she pleasured me as well.  But we never had sex.  The closest we came was in a closet.  We were in our last years of junior high school.  I had just discovered this invention quaintly called the skateboard.  She stroked me until I came all over her shirt, although I'd begged her to let me "get inside of her."  Then, not really knowing about the unique physics of fucking.  Ironically, she declined.  I say ironically because she then when on, over the next ten years, to have three illegitimate children.  In other words, safe sex was not her forté.  

I contacted her because I wanted to fuck her.  I saw her at Thanksgiving.  We are in our 30s.  She is still single.  But she has a lovely figure for having had three children.  You see, I am fucked up.

Perhaps more on the incest prohibition soon.